Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story delves into the infamous 1989 murders of José and Kitty Menendez, who were killed by their sons, Lyle and Erik.
The series explores the complex and controversial case, highlighting the brothers’ claims of enduring years of physical, emotional, and sexual abuse at the hands of their parents, which they argue led them to commit the murders out of fear. The prosecution, however, argued that the brothers were motivated by a desire to inherit their family’s wealth.
Despite mixed reviews, particularly regarding its portrayal of the brothers and the inclusion of incestuous themes, the series has been watched by over 150 million people so far and has generated some interesting discussions across social media.
So, have you watched it yet? What are your thoughts and interpretations?
I found it a very compelling series and from a professional perspective, had many thoughts about the people within the programme and what could potentially be going for them in their life.
I personally believe that what they say happened to them, did happen. If the story is true to life, there was 4 generations of abuse stemming back to their Father’s Mother’s Uncle, and who knows how far back the abuse went before that. The scene where José tells his Mother about the harm she did to him when he was younger, showed a vulnerability that I believe came out of desperation for how he felt about what he had endured during childhood, but also about what he was doing to his sons.
Erik I believe suffered on all levels. The abuse from both his Father, Mother and his Brother affected him not only physically but emotionally and it changed his identity so he never really knew who he was. It left him questioning his sexuality and I sensed a real element of shame within him when he spoke about some of the sexual encounters with his Father feeling nice. Erik allowed himself to connect with how the abuse made him feel, to be vulnerable in places he felt safe, but this led him to be let down, by family members especially as he had told them and wasn’t believed. He told his therapist, who decided to record the sessions and unfortunately this was then leaked via the therapist’s mistress. In episode 5 that focused on Erik’s story telling to his lawyer, I felt a conflict between a huge heaviness and a sense of relief. The heaviness for me was the strength it must have taken to relive his experiences in such graphic detail, knowing this would also be used in court as part of his defence. The relief I felt was that he had finally found someone who would do all she could to NOT let him down. I got a sense that the lawyer felt maternal towards Erik and wanted to almost re-parent him, offering him all the things that he never received from his own Mother – to protect him, to love him, to believe him and to defend him. The lawyer admitted that she hadn’t been the best Mother to her own child and I feel that this was an opportunity for her to show that she could be a good Mother.
Lyle on the other hand, I think was affected differently to Erik. Not in any way do I mean, he didn’t suffer as much, but he coped differently. I believe he dissociated as a way of coping. He turned his powerlessness into power by abusing his Brother, lashing out in his interactions with his parents, especially his Mother who he felt anger towards for not protecting him like a Mother should. He spoke about the abuse reluctantly at first and when he did, it was like he was talking about someone else. He didn’t allow himself to connect emotionally and when he broke down in court, even then he was dissociated, acting a part for the jury. However, I believe these were his real feelings and emotions, but by telling himself he was acting with a purpose, it allowed him to express them. The argument of the brothers killing their parents so that they inherited their wealth, came from the reckless and flamboyant spending spree that the brothers went on in the days after their parent’s death. However, I personally feel that this was another way of coping. Lyle was the leader in this behaviour and I believe that Lyle needed to find something good in what has happened to him. Trying to make sense of the abuse, I feel that Lyle needed to experience a sense of justice, or revenge by way of buying nice things, spending as much of his parent’s money as possible – kind of sticking two fingers up at them and saying, “look what I’ve done.”
The Father, José, was a similar character to Lyle. A victim of abuse himself, he needed to take control of something in his life, so he controlled all the people in his life……hurt or be hurt was his way. I believe he buried his experiences far back in his mind as they were too painful to process. However, this decision affected his behaviours moving forward in life and ultimately allowed the cycle of abuse to repeat itself.
The Mother, Kitty, clearly needed a saviour, a rescuer, but we didn’t get much info about her background. She succumbed to a life of materialistic things but devoid of love, so started to abuse herself with alcohol to numb the pain. She was jealous of her sons and their relationship with their Father because in her eyes, rather than seeing that they were being abused, she hated them for having what she wanted, a loving and sexual relationship with her husband.
I know there are many, many more insights that can be drawn from watching this series and the thoughts above only scratch the surface of the impact that living in the Menendez family household had on all of the family members.
I think that when watching anything as emotive as this series, it’s important to take the lessons from it and to learn about the cycle of abuse, learned behaviours, generational trauma and the lengths that people go to, to escape harm.
Hayley McAuley
Psychotherapist